Letting Go And Leaving Uni

‘We all have this perfect picture in our minds of how things are supposed to be, and that’s why we all end up being disappointed.’

Who would’ve thought this chapter would end like this? Withdrawing from university in December 2014, something I never saw myself doing. It’s funny how we think we know. How we plan, plan, plan and are certain life will work out one way (things will go according to our own plan) and it ends up the complete opposite.

This season of my life I honestly wouldn’t change for the world, I grew and learned and I’ve been taken on a journey that I appreciate and cherish. It’s been long and hard but I’m confident about the future. Rightfully so, my happiness has been restored and I’ve decided to embrace this change and stand firm in my most recent decision.

I never thought I would have such a lovely effect on people and it’s a blessing knowing that I have. I was told that I touched people here and that means the world to me. Funny how you can be so oblivious to the impact you have on someone else’s journey when you are so familiar with the impact others have had on your journey.

I realised a few things in this period, the most important ones being:

1) This is not what I was called to do

2) Not alwaaaaays the best idea to mix your passion and your career  (this may vary and depends on the situation, career choice, passion and person)

3) It’s ok to let go when you realise that something isn’t for you

4) Letting go doesn’t mean failing

5) You cannot always live your life and make choices based on what people want and expect you to do

6) It doesn’t matter what people will think. You’ve gotta do you at some point and embrace your choices. What if it’s wrong? We all learn from our mistakes

7) You have a dream? Live it and work hard to achieve it

8) Be strong, be passionate, be daring, be confident and go out and do what you have been called to do (still working on this)

9) Sometimes God doesn’t want us to do the ‘obvious’

10) He’ll never forsake you and He’ll never start a work in you that He won’t or can’t finish.

I realise that everyone is different and I respect that what works for some certainly doesn’t work for others and that’s okay. Come on. Fashion isn’t for me. I don’t belong there; I belong in the community, out here, reaching out, touching and changing lives. As cliche as it sounds that’s what I’m passionate about, and that’s what I’m so longing to do. Yes, I should’ve pursued it earlier but God is the writer of my story and I needed this chapter, this path to prepare me for the next step.

One thing I’m grateful for is that I left on a good note. This was such a bittersweet goodbye. So grateful for the friendships I made in such a short period of time. I truly will miss some of you. For the first time in a long time I feel free and ready. My tutors acknowledged how hard I worked and how bad I wanted this, how much I wanted to succeed, and that’s all I could have asked for. My last day was the best day I had there because it was filled with love, joy, laughter, well wishes, hugs, solidifying friendships, the end of an era and everything in between.

In my leaving to pursue other things and in closing this chapter with confidence, I hope I’ve inspired people just as others have inspired me. I admire, commend and respect everyone who graduated from that place, as it is so, so far from a quiet stroll in the park.

All in all, I am so happy, and I am so grateful because as one door closes another one opens. I’m overjoyed with the way this turned out. Who knows where I’d be if I just followed my heart in the first place? I’d have no stories to tell and no lessons to pass down to anyone willing to listen. I bless God for allowing me to get this far and for stopping me from going any further. Truly there are blessings even when it seems like you’re in the midst of a nightmare.

I used to say that my time here was a shipwreck and I drowned, but no, it wasn’t a shipwreck, it was a very rocky boat ride to shore. I’m still rowing, still learning etc but now that I’ve arrived I plan to stay for a while (unless God states otherwise). So, when the time is right, I’ll hop back on the boat and row to the next island, but for now, land ahoy, land definitely ahoy!

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